Hello everyone. I finished my workout and the topic of dating kept swirling through my head. Yeah, I know, this sounds a little unusual. But, the pain of endless squats and lunges can cause your mind to wander to escape the pain.
I was thinking about some of the coaching sessions I did this week and the theme seems to be unhappy dating results. Dating really can be a great if you head into it with the right mind set. So, to start off the weekend, I decided to share a few dating tips that have brought me and many clients great success in the dating arena.
1. I Love Men. I love the way they look, smell, sound, and nearly everything else about them. I enjoy being friends with them and the cool information that they share with me. I like younger men, older men... basically men in general. I appreciate, honor, and respect them. Quite simply, I enjoy spending time with them. Do you notice a theme here?
Okay, I realize I am stating the obvious. Why would I spend time going on dates if I did not like men? Well, as an experienced relationship coach, I know women who going on dates that do not, in general, like men. Previous relationships or past experience with men overall have left them with a bitter or unpleasant "after taste". So, while they are looking to meet someone special. They already expect it to be a lousy experience. Well guess what, you cannot straddle the fence on this topic. Expecting to receive the worse usually means you will. This, my friends, can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Which leads me to my next point.
2. Leave your previous relationship/s at the proverbial door. This is a fresh start for you and the person you are meeting for the first time. My philosophy is: I am meeting an interesting new person who may become a great friend. I come with no expectations or judgements. I want to keep my mind and heart open to receive the experience. I expect the same, but if my date starts discussing their prior relationship in negative terms then, I know that they are still emotionally attached to their ex. This usually means they are not ready to move forward with anyone new so, I include the evening as a new experience and move on with my life. Which brings up my next point...
3. Expect to have a good time. Sounds simple, right? It can be... if... you allow yourself to have fun. Dating can be a nerve-wracking at times. But hopefully, you have spent some time beforehand learning some basics about your date. If you have then, great. This means you like him enough to learn even more. Dating is a process that, in my opinion, should start lightly then if you both decide you want to continue seeing each other. You can open up and share more. For me, I visualize a rosebud; to really enjoy the beauty of a rose and not damage the petals. You must allow it to open up naturally. Rushing the process will destroy the flower and leave you feeling very disappointed. Successful dating is no different. Dating should be a pleasant experience not a job interview or a free psychological session to complain about your ex.
4. You are in control at all times. I am adding this one because, some women seem confused about how to handle certain situations that may occur during a date. Well, I am here to tell you something extremely important. You DO NOT have to do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. During or after a date you may discover that your date has expectations that you are not comfortable fulfilling. ALWAYS respect yourself and say no. A gentleman would never put you in an uncomfortable position. He treats you with courtesy and respect and vice versa; you show him the same. Sharing a meal does not include sharing anything more.
I could go on and on, but I want to keep this as brief as possible. Dating can be fun; if you can get out of your head and move into your heart. I know it may feel a bit scary, but we all have been hurt in previous relationships. My advice is to live in the present moment. Because, if your past still has a choke-hold on your emotions. Dating and eventually find love is nearly impossible. So, be kind to yourself and allow yourself to live and love with newfound joy.
If you would like to discover ways to improve your dating and relationship success then, go to http://romancesexandlove.com and sign up on my "Bio" page to receive a Free 15 minute coaching session with me.
Have a sensuous and sexy Goddess style day
Cyndi Harris aka "Madame C"
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