Change Your Love Story

Good morning everyone, I have love on my mind. It is a subject that is never far from my thoughts. I talk to so many people that are terrified to let loose and allow love to be a consistent part of their lives.

Why? Because, previous disappointments have left them feeling afraid, betrayed, lonely, unattractive, or undeserving of happiness. While all of those feelings can be a bit overwhelming at times. They are not reasons to turn your back on love. Love does not desert you, but sometimes people do.

The one thing I have learned from person experience and from working with others; is some people are only in our lives to fulfill a special purpose along our path of personal growth. And once that lesson is learned they move on or we move on. Yes, sometimes it feels sad when someone we care for so deeply exits our lives. But, instead of feeling a bunch of negative or unhappy emotions; try a new approach.

Rewrite your story; instead think about the things you are grateful for and the positives lessons you can take from the experiences you shared with your ex and then, let go. Let go knowing that you are graciously moving on and allowing life and love to provide you with a new love when the time is right for you.

Holding on to the past makes it nearly impossible to enjoy a happy and fun new love experience. So, be courageous and rewrite your love story. It will benefit you in a multitude of pleasant and unexpected ways.

Have a wonderful weekend,

Cyndi Harris, HP
Relationship Solutions Coach, Author, and Joyologist
http://undeniablyirresistible.com


-- Post From My iPhone

"How to Love a Man"

I created this mini series called "How to Love a Man." to help a woman invite her man or future man back into her life..

In our mission to become independent and self-reliant. We have left behind some of our greatest defenders and support... Our men. Yes, I said it... "Our men". A good man can be a woman's greatest asset just as a good woman can be a man's. We were created to admire, appreciate, and love each other. The gift we offer each other is far greater then we realize or understand.

We allow ourselves to become so overloaded with doubt, fear, and mistrust that we some times miss out on a great guy who is more than able and willing to step up and be that King you are searching for to build and create your empire, raise a family, or other live desires and goals you may have.

Click the link to watch 
 "How to Love a Man"- the video

Ladies, men are not the enemy. They need us as much as we need them. Yes, I said, "We need them" because we do. Love is an emotion that is meant to be shared and as a woman we need to feel and bask in the "sunlight" that a loving man offers us. We need to share our "sunlight" as well. Nothing can replace the magic that happens within a happy, loving, passionate, and extraordinary relationship.

So, if you are struggling with finding ways to keep that flame alive within your current relationship or are ready to meet a new man and what to ensure greater success at finding and keeping him if you are single.

Watch the videos, they offer simple steps that can help you achieve the type of romantic relationship you have been searching for.

"How a Queen Attracts Her King"... Red Tent Wisdom with host Cyndi Harris 01/24 by Earth Angels Radio | Blog Talk Radio

Okay, ladies, are you ready to attract the type of man who makes your "heart sing"? Yes, then listen to this show which is part of my "How to Love a Man." series. This show is titled... "How a Queen Attracts Her King." Red Tent Wisdom with host Cyndi Harris 01/24 by Earth Angels Radio | Blog Talk Radio

How to Increase Your Online Dating Success

Hello everyone, I hope each of you had a wonderful weekend. This morning, as I was preparing breakfast, the idea of online dating came to mind. I started thinking about what a great way it is to meet people. Yet, so few people use this tool effectively. 


Think about it, online dating sites provide you with the opportunity to meet people literally worldwide. You have the option to meet people locally, nationwide, and worldwide. You can get to know some really great folks along the way while looking for your life partner. The possibilities are limitless, if you approach the process with honesty and an open mind.


I have heard the horror stories of online dates gone wrong. But, I have also heard about dating success. So, your experience probably has a great deal to do with your expectations and going into the experience with a few guideline. 


Here are some helpful tips.

1. Check your attitude - Before you start any dating process you need to understand your frame of mind. Are you starting your dating adventure with a good positive attitude or do you expect this to be challenging and too time consuming.
2. Decide why you have begun dating again. - Are you looking to meet some new people to simply date or are you looking for a long-term relationship? This is very important because, if you are not looking for a relationship and you meet someone who is. You can enjoy the experience, but do not be surprised if you do not receive a call for a second date. Nothing personal, simply different dating goals.
3. BE HONEST about yourself in your profile - This is a huge one. I have heard about and personally experienced this unfortunate behavior. You go on a date and when you meet him or her; the person looks... nothing... like their picture, is much older than they claim, or any other obvious deception. Think about this, if you are dating to meet someone and fall in love. Would you really want to build a future with someone who starts out being dishonest? If you are unable to trust them from the beginning. How will you be able to trust them in the future? And no... you will not win over your date with the strength of your personality. All your date wants to do is leave as gracefully and quickly as possible. So, to prevent hurt feelings and wasted time... Be honest about how look, your body type, etc. If your current look bothers you. There are many things you can do to improve your appearance. You can seek the help of professionals who can help you update your look.
4. Create an interesting profile - take the time to write, at least, a good 500 word paragraph about yourself. Trust me, 500 words is not as much as you think. I want you to include a few things about you and your interests. Be creative, this is your time to stand out from the crowd. I have seen some men who filled out 2 sentences then, request that you ask  more about them when you contact them. Really? They did not offer anything interesting to attract my interest. So, how am I suppose to begin a conversation? Don't be lazy... a well-crafted profile will make it easier for the type of men or women you are looking for to reach out to you.
5. Include at least 2 great current pictures (1 headshot and 1 full-body) - Ah! Now, I have you thinking you. Yes, a full-body shot, this will eliminate any deceptions about your appearance. Also, no pictures of you partying with your friends. From the feedback that I receive from clients and the random people I talk to. These shots are not very flattering. If you want to show that you are a fun and social person; include it in your profile paragraph. Finally, do not include pictures of your children. Especially young ones, this is a safety issue. You do not know who is looking at your profile. I am a proud parent as well but, Safety First. 
6. Expand your options - Join more than 1 dating site. Generally recommend at least 2, this way you can meet a variety of different people.
7. Give yourself at least 3 months on the sites before you throw up your hands and give up on the whole experience. Love takes time and should not feel pressured. Slow down and spend some time getting to know new people. And, if you meet someone and it turns into several dates that is wonderful. Just be sure to have fun and allow things to unfold naturally. 

There are a few helpful hints to increase your success with online dating. Online dating can be so much fun and really is a great way to meet someone special. So, what are you waiting for? Life is meant to be lived. And love isn't waiting for you while you hiding at home. 

There is a special offer on this page for a Free 3 Day Trial with Match.com. You can meeting new people today and have some exciting dates planned for this coming weekend. Click on the button up top to join the "Leading Online Dating Site in the World". Enjoy!

Have a sensuous and sexy day,

Cyndi Harris aka Madame C

http://yoursexybest.com

http://romancesexandlove.com

http://21stcenturysexgoddess.com

How to Gracefully Leave an Uncomfortable Date.

Hello everyone, I hope each of you had a wonderful weekend. 


I was talking to a dear friend of mine and she has asked me to do a series of blogs and radio shows about dating and how to deal with a variety of unexpected situations. She is new to the dating world and is running into some issues with overly aggressive men. 


So, today I am going to talk about how to gracefully end an uncomfortable date. The world of dating really can be exciting and fun. There are many wonderful men out there. I know according to every thing you read or watch on TV... there is a shortage of good men. Not true, there are plenty of good men available to date and eventually create a lasting relationship.

If you are careful (not overly-cautious), confident, happy, and truly enjoy the company of men. You will be amazed at the types of wonderful guys you will meet. Yes, you will meet a few odd ones here and there. But, overall if you are expecting a good experience you will have one.


Let's get back to the uncomfortable date. First I want to be sure you have done the following before you go on any date. Here's your checklist:

1. Actually speak (emails and texts do not count) to your date at least 2 - 3 times before you physically meet. And, you have gotten to know a few things about him.
2. Select a public place for your date. (Isolated romantic spots can wait until you are officially dating and you have more background information about him.)
3. Drive your own car. (I recommend doing this for the first few dates)
4. Select a place that has valet parking and use the valet. It may cost you a few dollars, but your safety is worth it. Especially, if you are removing yourself from a date gone wrong. He will be unable to follow you to your car if it is being brought to you. (Safety First!)
5. Let someone close to you know your dates name and where you are going.
6. Leave his phone # with a close friend or family member. 
7. Make arrangements to call your friend when the date is over and you have arrived home safely.
8. Use Common Sense... this is a date with someone you really Do Not know.

Now, if you are on the date and are feeling uncomfortable... Maybe your date has made it very clear he expects you to come to his place when you are done with dinner. And, you have told him no. He keeps talking about it and is becoming disrespectful as you continue to say no. Do the following:

1. LEAVE... Yes, get up from the table and go. Do not sit there and continue to allow someone to make you feel bad. You are not being impolite. You are simply withdrawing from a situation that is no longer enjoyable and you may feel will become even more unpleasant if you remain. Your self-respect is a priority.

Simply sharing a meal with someone does not entitle him to anything more than the pleasure of your company. You are not obligated to kiss him good night, have sex with him, or any other thing that you have no desire to do. I know things can get a little twisted out there. I have heard a few of the insults a man will use if things are not going as he planned.


If you have run into this type of person. It is not a true man that you are dealing with and you need to cut ties as soon as possible. A gentleman is enjoyable and gracious. He is willing to take his time to get to know you. He will not do or say things to make you feel uneasy.  A true gentleman is there to spend time to learn more about you and give you a chance to learn more about him. No strings attached... Period.


Hopefully, this brief blog will at least remind you to always put your safety first. Ending a lousy date is not the end of the world. You will go on another date and continue to meet wonderful new people. Let the icky ones go.


If you have any dating questions or concerns. You can email them to me at romancesexandlove@gmail.com.


Have a sensuous and sexy day,


Cyndi Harris aka "Madame C"
http://yoursexybest.com 

Secrets to Successful Dating

Hello everyone. I finished my workout and the topic of dating kept swirling through my head. Yeah, I know, this sounds a little unusual. But, the pain of endless squats and lunges can cause your mind to wander to escape the pain.


I was thinking about some of the coaching sessions I did this week and the theme seems to be unhappy dating results. Dating really can be a great if you head into it with the right mind set. So, to start off the weekend, I decided to share a few dating tips that have brought me and many clients great success in the dating arena. 


1. I Love Men. I love the way they look, smell, sound, and nearly everything else about them. I enjoy being friends with them and the cool information that they share with me. I like younger men, older men... basically men in general. I appreciate, honor, and respect them. Quite simply, I enjoy spending time with them. Do you notice a theme here? 


Okay, I realize I am stating the obvious. Why would I spend time going on dates if I did not like men? Well, as an experienced relationship coach, I know women who going on dates that do not, in general, like men. Previous relationships or past experience with men overall have left them with a bitter or unpleasant "after taste". So, while they are looking to meet someone special. They already expect it to be a lousy experience. Well guess what, you cannot straddle the fence on this topic. Expecting to receive the worse usually means you will. This, my friends, can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. Which leads me to my next point.


2. Leave your previous relationship/s at the proverbial door. This is a fresh start for you and the person you are meeting for the first time. My philosophy is: I am meeting an interesting new person who may become a great friend. I come with no expectations or judgements. I want to keep my mind and heart open to receive the experience. I expect the same, but if  my date starts discussing their prior relationship in negative terms then, I know that they are still emotionally attached to their ex. This usually means they are not ready to move forward with anyone new so, I include the evening as a new experience and move on with my life. Which brings up my next point...


3. Expect to have a good time. Sounds simple, right? It can be... if... you allow yourself to have fun. Dating can be a nerve-wracking at times. But hopefully, you have spent some time beforehand learning some basics about your date. If you have then, great. This means you like him enough to learn even more. Dating is a process that, in my opinion, should start lightly then if you both decide you want to continue seeing each other. You can open up and share more. For me, I visualize a rosebud; to really enjoy the beauty of a rose and not damage the petals. You must allow it to open up naturally. Rushing the process will destroy the flower and leave you feeling very disappointed. Successful dating is no different. Dating should be a pleasant experience not a job interview or a free psychological session to complain about your ex.  


4. You are in control at all times. I am adding this one because, some women seem confused about how to handle certain situations that may occur during a date. Well, I am here to tell you something extremely important. You DO NOT have to do anything that makes you feel uncomfortable. During or after a date you may discover that your date has expectations that you are not comfortable fulfilling. ALWAYS respect yourself and say no. A gentleman would never put you in an uncomfortable position. He treats you with courtesy and respect and vice versa; you show him the same. Sharing a meal does not include sharing anything more. 


I could go on and on, but I want to keep this as brief as possible. Dating can be fun; if you can get out of your head and move into your heart. I know it may feel a bit scary, but we all have been hurt in previous relationships. My advice is to live in the present moment. Because, if your past still has a choke-hold on your emotions. Dating and eventually find love is nearly impossible.  So, be kind to yourself and allow yourself to live and love with newfound joy.


If you would like to discover ways to improve your dating and relationship success then, go to http://romancesexandlove.com and sign up on my "Bio" page to receive a Free 15 minute coaching session with me. 


Have a sensuous and sexy Goddess style day


Cyndi Harris aka "Madame C"